Soulpreneur Scaling Stories Podcast: 19. What to do when you start to resent your business

Welcome back to another episode of Soulful Scaling Stories. Today’s topic is one that’s often swept under the rug in entrepreneurial circles — the challenge of feeling resentment towards your own business. It’s a conversation we rarely have because, well, aren’t we supposed to be endlessly grateful for the businesses we’ve built?

But here’s the truth: resentment can rear its head, and we’re diving deep into it today. In this judgment-free space, we’re going to explore why resentment happens, the underlying causes, how to navigate those emotions, and, most importantly, how to rekindle your love for your business. Whether you’re a virtual assistant or another service provider, chances are you’ve encountered resentment along your business journey. Fear not, we’re here to fix it and guide you back to a business you love.

Feeling resentment indicates that your business is evolving faster than your current setup. It’s a sign that you’re ready for the next level.

To support you on this journey, check out the resources I’ve prepared. Head to dancingleafsolutions.com/resources for tools to help you through this reimagining process.

Remember, resentment is not permanent. By listening to yourself, releasing judgment, and reimagining your business, you can move beyond resentment and build a business that lights you up.

If you’re ready to create an aligned, scalable offer suite, explore my program, Ascension, at dancingleafsolutions.com/Ascension.

You’ve got this! I’m here to chat and support you. Until next time, keep scaling soulfully!


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Transcript

[00:00:00] Andrea Elibero: Andrea here, your host and passionate business coach and scaling strategist for Soulful Service Providers and Coaches. Welcome to another episode of Soulpreneur Scaling Stories. Have you ever wanted to look behind the curtain of your fellow entrepreneur’s business to see what actually went into scaling it?

Well, you are in for a treat because that’s exactly what we are doing here. In each episode, we will be uncovering the truth the lessons and the stories behind what it truly takes for solepreneurs to scale their businesses intentionally. I’m hoping that their stories will help you to unlock the true potential of your business so you can create your own soulful, abundant, and aligned laptop lifestyle through intentional scaling.

So whether you’re just starting out on your scaling journey, or you’re a seasoned entrepreneur seeking inspiration, this episode has something incredible in store for you. Are you ready to rise, grow, and create? Create a business that fully supports your dream life. Well, let’s dive in before we begin, make sure to hit that subscribe buttons.

You never miss an empowering episode filled with real stories and soulful insights.

 Hello, my friends, welcome back. I’m super excited to talk about today’s topic, which is resentment towards your own business. So I feel like this is something that people don’t often talk about. It’s kind of taboo, right? Because we’re supposed to be just eternally grateful for our businesses and what we have created.

[00:01:38] MacBook Pro Microphone & FaceTime HD Camera: But resentment pops up and we’re going to get into this today. So I want to have an open judgment free conversation about why resentment happens, what causes these feelings, how you can move through them, and most importantly, what you can do to really fall back in love with your business. So whether you are a virtual assistant or another type of service provider, chances are you have experienced resentment at some point along your business journey.

Don’t worry. We are going to fix it. We are going to figure out why we’re going to get into all these things so you can fall back in love with your business again. So really, let’s get into it. No more waiting around. Okay, so there are a few main reasons why resentment can pop up and you can really start to feel this in your business.

I will tell you that I have Had times in my business where I have felt these exact things. So let’s talk about the first one. So the first one is You might start to feel resentment in your business when you start to feel bored or uninspired by your offerings I will tell you that this has happened to me Hmm When I first started out, I was a virtual assistant offering general VA services, because that’s where we all start out, right?

Because I didn’t have any, any experience in anything. And after a little while, that was great at first while I was learning, but after a little while, man. It was not it anymore for me. I was so bored. I was like, I don’t want to do this anymore. I was procrastinating Tasks that should have been done in 10 minutes.

I just was I was just not feeling it, you know So and this happens a lot, right? So at first you’re learning you’re really excited and then now these things start to feel kind of stale and you’re like Why am I even doing this anymore? It’s not challenging to you anymore So this is a really common thing is to really outgrow Certain services or things that you have offered and even if, you know, you were like really known for this or even if at some point like this was like your main thing, that things can become monotonous.

You can fall out of love with them. You can discover new things, you know, that you would rather be focused on. So, point one of reasons why people often feel resentment, it is because they have outgrown some of the services that they have offered. And then point number two, another source of resentment can be your actual clients.

Are your clients still, or at all, ever, right, aligned with you and your business? So maybe as you have grown over time, so has your ideal client avatar grown over time, but you are still doing work with these Quote unquote older clients doing things, you know, that you’re not aligned with, with clients that you’re no longer aligned with.

Maybe you have strength in your boundaries, but you still have clients that are not really respecting that and are kind of used to you with your previous version of yourself when you didn’t have boundaries. Maybe your passions have just shifted. So maybe, in my case, when I started, I worked mainly with healthcare professionals because I came from nursing.

I was a, uh, excuse me, I was, you know, doing therapy, and then nursing, and then I did a lot of health, and then really that had grown for me into the more soulful clients. So, I’ve experienced this as well, where my passions had shifted. So there are often times a mismatch between what you’re doing, where you were before, and where you are now.

This mismatch can leave you really dreading the client work, again, starting to resent it, starting to really resent these clients, resenting your business, and really feel like, oh, am I outgrowing this? I’ve had coaching clients, so virtual assistants, who were my clients. Who, this is really common, where maybe they were working doing some type of thing or it’s like, Oh, I just need to get clients and they’re doing like all of the things and then they’re eventually like, Oh, like, I don’t actually want to do those things.

And, but now they’ve committed to it and they feel like they can’t get out of it, etc, etc. So, what happens because of this? Resentment, right? You guessed it. Okay. And then the third thing is overwhelm and burn out. Huge. These are huge. So the demands of working one on one with multiple clients can really get exhausting over time, especially if you are fully booked out, especially if, you know, your boundaries are a little bit shaky, especially if you actually have too many clients because you’re trying to hit a certain income goal.

And, um, Also, when you have these types of clients who are really starting to demand a lot of things from you, or they’re asking you for things outside of your scope of work, they’re asking you for things outside of your business hours, you know, they’re kind of hitting you up at all hours of the day, like, can you do this for me really quick?

Everything’s on fire, this, that, you know, XYZ, you know, you have been there, right? So this overwhelm can really be like, lead you to really thinking like, why am I doing this in the first place? Right? And this is not enjoyable. This is not the reason that you got into your business in the first place. You know, are you really feeling all of this like burnout and overwhelm and just really like losing the sense of you, your sense of purpose, the sense of why you started this business.

Again, I have been there, right? I have been through all of these things I’ve gone into. And come out the other side and have learned from them, have shifted things around to learn from them. The burnout was a huge one for me a couple of years ago when I was really really full and booked out with OBM one on one retainer client work and that was all that I was doing because this was really high level, very demanding, and I got extremely burned out and it actually resulted in, in a decrease in my In my mental health, it resulted in a decrease in my income.

It resulted in a decrease in basically everything across the board because I didn’t stop, because I kept going and going and going until I literally couldn’t anymore. So, I had resentment. I did not have the motivation to do any of the work. I was procrastinating. I couldn’t, I just couldn’t do it. You know, this was, it wasn’t working anymore.

So. Those are the three things. I have experienced all of them and, and it might not just be one, it might be a combination of them. Maybe you’re bored with your offers, you’ve outgrown your offers, and you have some misaligned clients, and you are in overwhelm from all the work you’re doing. All of this together, of course, is a recipe for resentment.

Now, don’t worry because So, this is actually good news. The good news is that you are feeling this, and the reason you are feeling this is because your business is evolving faster than you, than you and your systems and you know and everything and your offers and your business structure. So resentment is a clear indication.

Meaning that you are ready to step into the next level of your business. So that’s actually really exciting. So, what do we do? Right, so, okay. Now we know, we’re feeling resentment. Oh, that means something. That means that there’s something on the horizon for me. So let’s get into what to do now that you know that you are feeling resentment towards your business and that that means that something has to change.

So. Very, very, very important is the first step of identifying which of the three things or maybe something else is the actual root cause of your resentment for you. So like I said, resentment can come from any number of places, right? So it can come from Your offers, your clients, your just, your capacity, and other things.

So really what I want you to do in this stage is to, we have to identify the problem before we can find the solution. So I invite you to take a little bit of time. Sit down with your journal, really go through what you’re doing, and really dig within yourself. And just start free journaling on what you’re doing, what your feelings are.

See what patterns come up. Don’t limit yourself when you’re doing exercises like this. Go all in, no censorship, and see what comes up for you. Maybe sit in meditation, go out in nature, do something to really prepare yourself to, to look inward and see what is feeling misaligned. Okay, we have the feelings, we have resentment, now we need to know the root cause of the resentment for you personally.

And we need to know this because this is the guide that tells you what to do, right? So this is how you’re going to get your solutions, is first you need to know what is actually causing the problem. Okay, and then the second thing, the second step is to Release any self judgment around these feelings.

Your feelings of resentment around your business are completely valid. Your feelings are coming from a true place. Your resentment says absolutely nothing about your self worth. It says nothing about your abilities. It says nothing about your capabilities. It says nothing about you as a business owner.

All it is telling you is that there is an area for growth and that there is some sort of misalignment somewhere. That is it. I really want you to walk away embodying this. And honestly, when you’re doing this, if you are having feelings of, you know, well, Well, how the heck do I do that? You know, like I’m having these feelings.

Reach out to me, DM me. We, we can chat about it. There are many things to do, too. I have some really good exercises for this, which is too long to get into now, but yeah, I want you to be aware. So again, release, Your self judgment, so we have identified where the, where the resentment has come from, and we are saying there’s no judgment here.

My self worth is not predicated on how I’m feeling about my business. This means that it is an area for growth, and there is something that is just misaligned, and in conjunction with that, really, really get grateful. Be grateful. See this as an indicator of That something is ready to change, and you have identified that.

You are able to listen to yourself. You’re, you are telling yourself something. And, So, for you to be able to listen and then trust yourself to take the steps necessary is huge. A lot of people don’t do that in a lot of areas of life and this is a, a very, very, this is a skill and this is something that I am very passionate about, is about this listening to your intuition and your self trust and knowing what you have to do to move forward.

So you’re, again, your resentment is not a negative thing, it is a positive thing to do. Thank. To literally say thank you out loud, you know, be grateful for because it is telling you that We get to do something about it, right? We’ve identified the problem now we get to grow. So this is the fun part So this is step three And this is what we do now, that we have figured out, okay, this is why we’re resentful.

We have gone through the feelings, we’ve moved through them, we have not ignored them and put them on the back burner. It’s really important to move through the feelings. And now, it’s the fun part, we get to imagine what we actually want in our business and in our lives moving forward. So if you, this, this is the part where I really, really love helping people.

Some of the things that you can do are to really envision, you know, what are the, what’s your ideal day? What does it look like? What does it feel like? What do you want to spend your time doing? Who do you want to serve? Go back through, identify with whatever it is that caused the resentment, what needs to change.

So my first resentment, which was when I outgrew my offers, I up leveled and I changed my offers. I moved into being an OBM. Um, my second resentment, which came from the burnout, really caused me to, to drastically shift my business model away from the one on one client work because that wasn’t sustainable for me anymore.

Right? The one on one client work was not feeling aligned anymore. It served me really well for a couple, for a couple of years. And now I was ready to get into something else. And that’s what that resentment was telling me. So what is your resentment telling you? And what do you need to do to move forward?

and to grow and all of those things. So use this, use this time, this feeling as an opportunity to get crystal clear on your goals and on the next evolution of your offers. So, you can really take this as like a time, again it’s really exciting, to build something fresh and new and something that lights you up again, something that you’re really excited about.

You know, so like, remember how you felt when you were starting your business, aside from the fear? And like, you know, it was also really exciting. You can have that feeling again, and since you already know how to build a business, you get to do it in an even better way, a more aligned way, an aligned, a way that makes sense.

so much sense for you that feels so exciting. So. By taking inventory of where you outgrown your current business model, you get to, again, build something fresh and new. So maybe you want to get into coaching a little bit, right? Maybe you want to make like an even bigger impact than what you’ve been doing.

Maybe you want to do some strategy. Maybe you want to create some digital courses, leverage your expertise in a membership. Maybe you want to do some sort of high touch one on one hybrid thing. You know, maybe you want to make some recurring revenue streams. Like get creative. This is the fun part. So think through some different business models, some service offerings that would really allow you to fall back in love with your work while you scale.

And I do have, if you check out the show notes or go to dancingleafsolutions. com slash resources, and I have a couple of resources if you’re like, I have no idea what I want to do. I have resources that will totally help you with this. So. What have we learned today? Resentment is totally common and it is not permanent.

By listening to yourself, by trusting yourself, by listening to the signals that your body is sending you, with compassion, releasing your judgment and reimagining your business, you can move beyond the resentment and the burnout. And by the way, if you are ready to create an aligned Scalable offer suite and really up level your business in a way that lights you up.

I also invite you to check out my program, Ascension, dancingleafsolutions. com slash Ascension. Obviously, it’ll be on the show notes for you to click on as well. I would love to support you to scale beyond one on one retainer clients with strategic and uniquely you offers so you can create more purpose and profit in your business.

Okay, my friends, that is all for today. As always, I know that you’ve got this. I’m here to chat with you, I’m here to support you, and I will talk to you next time.

[00:16:56] Andrea Elibero: Thank you so much for joining us today. I really hope you found inspiration and insights from today’s episode. You know, scaling your business intentionally and from the inside out is a transformational process, but I’m here to support you every step of the way. Head on over to dancingleafsolutions. com slash resources for free tools to help you do just that.

And thank you again for being a part of the Soulpreneur Scaling Stories community. Your presence and dedication to growth inspire me every day.